To Do or not To Do

I have a theory. If you drop all inhibitions and have sex in the initial meetings, it paves a way for a stronger, healthier relationship later. It would also be a relationship based on honesty and openness; two of the few strong pillars on which the relationship stands. This theory has come about as a result of a conclusion based on observing various couples at play, around. Now-a-days, thankfully, people are a bit more relaxed about sex, and here in India too people don’t think much about it today. But there are still some out there, who just wouldn’t let go. Now I am not encouraging or forcing anyone to do anything. Sex is complicated, especially if you really like someone. You do want to tread carefully. Think over each little step forward, or back, if that is what needs to be done. It’s a very personal choice; make it at your own discretion. This article is for those few who have grown up thinking that sex is a huge deal and can happen only after having spent an x amount of time or experiences with someone. Sex is a huge deal, of course; but things have altered a bit now. In today’s day and age, a fast paced life, it helps to not be too rigid in our thinking about anything, most of all sex.

Consider a regular Joe and Jane. At a conscious or subconscious level, Joe wants to get laid. Jane wants flowers, sweet nothings, promises…the list goes on. The two start dating, first unofficially, then officially. Mostly because Joe wants Jane to get comfortable, like him enough, to “open up”. Trust me Joe, you do. Of course Joe may want the sweet frills of being in a relationship too, but sex is a strong underlying current, which Joe may or may not be consciously aware about; it can make or break things for him. So Joe and Jane are dating; they become a “thing”. They introduce themselves to their respective friends. When they do end up doing it, it may be great, or not. At that point things have gone ahead a bit, for both of them, they like each other enough, they have become used to each other, they enjoy being in a relationship, it could be anything. But if the sex is not that great, it would eventually start gnawing on the innards of that relationship. Disagreements and fights will ensue. And by the time the break-up happens, a good amount of time would’ve been wasted, for both of them. If they stick it, with all their might, it could end up being a sad, bitter life, full of disharmony.

So, just to be sure, go ahead and do it. If they don’t call back, after that first encounter, well, good riddance. You had a good, fun evening and are an experience richer. And if they do call back and want to see you again, then you know it’s for genuine reasons.

~As originally posted on http://www.teerathyatra.com/

Leave a comment